Friday, April 25, 2014

Trying to find courage in a moment of weakness…


I have lost weight before. I do not know why I am struggling so much with the urge to indulge and eat whatever I want to when I KNOW that I am not eating healthy and I KNOW that it isn’t what I want to be doing. I feel terrible about what I have been eating, yet I do not have the strength that I once had to resist temptation for foods that I know I should not be eating.
The frustration and the challenge that I am facing with my internal strength is only making things worse. I am only gaining weight and not losing it. I know that if I keep at it and am CONSISTENT, I will see results.
Key roadblocks that have kept me from really being intentional about what I am eating—
Travel-I love to travel. I just got home from Paris, where I lost a few pounds due to all the walking, and am now in Las Vegas. Boy the contrast between the 2! Paris is full of fresh fruits and vegetables, organic meats, and to be honest I am not a fan of French food so I did not indulge very much. Vegas, on the other hand, is the land of crazy, indulgent buffets, and insane amounts of food. Not to mention fast food every corner you turn and very little fruits, vegetables, and organic foods. As I write this, I am in Vegas, feeling terribly guilty about a delicious meal that I just ate AND feeling horrible about the way I look in one of my favorite sundresses. I gain weight in my stomach first and it looks like I have a baby bump---which I assure you, I am NOT pregnant! But I digress….
Thirty-One—when I commit to something and start something new, I give it my ALL. Every waking moment is spent on accomplishing a new challenge. I feel like when I started running and eating healthy, I was concentrating solely on accomplishing my weight loss goal. Now that I have added other goals to my life such as succeeding with Thirty-One, I am not giving my fitness and health the attention that it deserves.

Husband-I really can’t blame this on him. I used to be able to say that he likes to go out to eat all the time and that is why I was having trouble. The truth of the matter is that I have just been lazy. I haven’t been cooking or grocery shopping like I did when I was losing weight.
Lack of motivation-I had an intense bought of motivation. I was eager to lose weight for my wedding and I wanted to feel and look good. My sister is getting married in a year and I want to look good for her wedding as well. Why is my motivation waning?!
What to do…something has got to give…
Do I sign up for another race? Do I start crossfit or something new to take on so I become obsessed with accomplishing another fitness goal? What would you do?

0 thoughts:

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